All you have to do is webcam (that's right, "to webcam", it's a verb now) yourself singing along to Sh!t Theatre's 'Election Song'. Alternatively, use your clever phone or whatever video device you kids have these days. E-mail us the video (shittheatre@gmail.com) or, if it's easier for you, upload it to Youtube and send us the link.
Record and send by the 5th February at the latest, to be included in the SHUNT performance! The performance shall be part of 'AiR Supply @ SHUNT' on Friday 11th February!
Here is a link to a video of Sh!t Theatre performing the 'Election Song' on Youtube, for you to sing along with:
http://www.youtube.com/wat
The lyrics are printed below:
Uncle David [Pause]
Uncle David, he’s related
To Queen Victoria
And TV historian Adam Hart Davis.
And in the recent expenses scandal it
Was revealed
That he spent
Two thousand five hundred and ninety four pounds on
‘Centrally purchased stationary’.
That’s fifth place in the country
For an MP [Pause]
On stationary.
He’s got one wife
Two kids
One dead kid.
Poor David.
Cerebral palsy
And epilepsy
Didn’t live very long sadly
Now Uncle David knows healthcare
Should be free.
Some things you learn from your father.
Some things you learn from your kids.
One point David.
Uncle Gordon [Pause]
He’s got one wife
Two kids
One dead kid.
‘How am I supposed to compare him with David?’
I hear you say,
‘When they have the same number of
Dead – kids?’
Well, he’s blind in one eye
And the kid that’s still alive
Has got a disability
So two-and-a-half points please.
Cystic fibrosis
Life expectancy is thirty-five.
He won’t get to do all those fun things like:
Be so drunk your sick on your parents head, or
Have sex in your parents’ bed, or…
(Childhood!)
…Or get a crush on your friend
But not say anything
Lest it disturb the
De-li-cate social balance.
Won’t be able to vote.
Won’t be able to vote Labour
Or get things wrong
Or get things right
Now Uncle Gordan knows the value of young life (/Or get things wrong)
Like how things should be a bit more easy (/Or get things right)
Like education for free.
Some things you learn from your father.
Some things you learn from your kids.
Two-and-a-half points Gordon.
Uncle Nick [Pause]
He’s got one wife
And three healthy children.
That’s why he’s the leader of the lib dems
And will never win
An election. [Pause]
Some things you learn from your father.
Some things you learn from your kids.
Your dead - kids.
Uncle Nick.
When he was a teen in Munich
He burnt a rare collection of cacti
But since he’s such a good guy
He hasn’t been arrested for arson since then
And now he’s the leader of the lib dems.
Becca: Louise, how many women has he slept with?
Louise: Erm, no more than thirty-four –
Becca: Before the age of twenty-four
Both: The Daily Mail call him
Clegover
Thank god he doesn’t have a
Vagina…
Talking of Vaginas… [Pause]
Auntie Caroline.
No points for her
Because of her vagina…
Uncle Nick [Boo!]
Uncle Nick.
Educated in Suffolk.
One of only two boys at an all-girls school.
One eye,
One glass eye.
Nick Griffin’s father
Was the leader of the National Front
So he didn’t want any of
These! Or any of
These! Or any of
These! Who agrees? (/Or any of these)
Hands up please?
Yes, you. The young gentleman at the front with the tiny moustache…
Some things you learn from your
Massively racist, homophobic bigot of a father
Some things you learn from your kids.
Minus-one-million points Nick Griffin…
Some things you learn from your father.
Some things you learn from your kids.
That’s politics.
Have fun!
shittheatre@gmail.com
[By the way: the video is not an audition tape, it is footage that will be used in the Shunt performance. So make it as embarrassing as possible! Though what would be funny is if we made you audition to be in Sh!t Theatre. Like you desperately, desperately, wanna be us]
